The Awesome Adventures of Los Mexicanos
by bostonian-FTW
Summary: The Mexican Twins have an interesting day today, involving a raging Italian and an oblivious Spaniard. -is too lazy to explain better- Rated T, because, well, ROMANO. Suspense because I'm cruel WARNING: LOTS OF FAIL!SPANISH USED.


**Author's note: Mkay, so since this fic has two OCs, I thought I'd introduce them to you a bit before we get going. First, THEY ARE NOT MINE. They belong to **_**mi amiga**_** Chibibun. And second, they represent North and South Mexico, much like the Italies are two in one. Because of this, I tended to use alot of my crappy Spanish skillz in this, so for all of you people who don't know Spanish, translations are at the end. (And there are a LOT of them. Sorry, I couldn't help myself D: ) Third, the twins were brought up by all three of the bad touch trio. I apologize now for anything they might do that makes them look like France or Prussia. Spain's awesomer than them. (Just don't tell him I said that. Also, don't tell America I think that he grows some fucking delicious tomatoes.)**

**Wow this was really long. So then, **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. I wish I did, oh so very badly, but I only own the idea. And now, **_**te presento**_**, Spanish Relations!**

"Hmph."

Romano was not in a good mood today. (For Romano at least.)

First, he had fallen asleep whilst making his special eggplant rolatini, successfully burning it to smouldering bits and causing the smoke alarms to go off, which also woke him up from his siesta. Second, Antonio had been here earlier. That in itself wasn't necessarily a bad thing for Romano, but the bastard had dragged along Francis and Gilbert as well. The destruction to his living room alone was going to cost a small fortune.

In an attempt to distract himself from his day, Romano decided to log onto his computer. This was not a good move, for when his computer had finally started up, Romano decided to check on the Blog of the World. The Blog of the World is a website for nations to blog about their lives as nations, to talk politics with nations that are far away from themselves, and to vent about how bad their day was. This last option was what Romano usually did, and was his intention today, but someone else's blog had caught his eye today. The owners of the blog go by many many different and super-long names, but to Romano they were los Mexicanos. Their blog was all about telling their take on the lives of the other nations (and ex-nations and hopefull future nations) of the world. To Romano's horror, today the twins had decided to focus on South Italy and Spain's relationship.

"CH- CH- CHIGIIIIIIII~! Mexicanos, you are SO DEAD!"

Romano then, with all the speed that a raging Italian could muster (alot), made his way to Mexico City, Mexico, to give some choice words (and maybe a few punches) to Fernando and Nieve Fernandez.

*~!~*

"Mkay, Fern, so how about you stop flirting with Tejas and get your lazy butt onto the Blog!"

"N, I am not flirting with Tejas. We were having a nice little chat is all."

"Yeah, about where you guys are gonna go on a date tomorrow night."

"Sita, what the hell? I am not dating Tejas!"

"Ésto no es verdad! Yo sé que tu y Tejas saleron semana pasada!"

"And where's your proof, huh?"

"Locked up somewhere safe for future blackmailing purposes."

"What? What kind of proof are we talking about here?"

"Video. Of you and Tejas. Making out on the front doorstep. Y en la casa. Japón y Hungría really enjoyed it. But I still have the original."

"¿QUÉ? You sold a video of... Me and Tejas... To Japón y Hungría?"

"Sí. Ellos me pagan bien."

"Is there any chance that they haven't seen them yet? Any chance at all?"

"Oh, Fern. Silly, silly plant. They both posted it to their yaoi blog last night!"

"I hate you."

"Yo sé."

And with that, Nieve smiled and walked into the computer room belonging to both twins. In said room, there were twenty or so computers and five printers. Nieve quickly sat down at one below the wide bay window overlooking their neighborhood, while Fern sat on the opposite side of the room, in the darkest corner that could not be found by the sun. As each twin logged into their computer, they continued to cuss at each other in rapid Spanish, until a very aggravated Fern finally groaned in defeat. When it came to cussing fights, Nieve had learned from the best. *coughGilbertandArthurcough*

As soon as they had both successfully logged into their Blog of the World joint account, the twins began a live feed blog, as they had done each day since the creation of the Blog. And today's targets, they had decided yesterday, were none other than Italia del Sur and España. But just as they were about to begin telling the world about this one time when there was a thunderstorm at Spain's house and Romano got scared, they heard a loud war cry coming from down the street, quickly moving towards their house.

"Romano must've heard about today's victims- I mean subjects. Yes, subjects." Said Nieve. Then, screaming all the way, Romano came bursting through the door with all the force of a rampaging bull that's seen red.

"What the hell do you two think you're doing?"

"Nice to see you too, Romano. And we're not doing anything...yet." Nieve grinned.

"I know you two are writing something nasty about Spagna and me. So you better not type anything else up, or else you're dead!"

"And what part of your relationship with Papá is so important that you came all the way to México just to cover it up from the rest of the world, hn? Everyone in the world already knows how you feel about Papá. Except Papá himself. So what's to hide, hermano Romano? Not embarrassed, are you?" Nieve said as she stalked closer to an increasingly reddening Italian.

"Wh- what the hell? No! O-of course not! I- I would n-never!" choked Romano.

"Oh, come on, Bajito, it's too obvious! The only reason that Papí hasn't made a move on you yet is because he doesn't know what your reaction will be! He's under the impression that you only like him as a brother or a father! He's too dense to see what's blatantly obvious to everyone else! And that is that you're in love with Papí!" Fern shouted, while also moving towards Romano. All poor Romano could do was stand there in shock as this new information sunk in. Spagna loves me that way too...? And everyone knows it. Wait, what?

"How the hell does everyone know th- I mean why the hell does everyone think that?"

Nieve responded with, "It's obvious by the way you act around each other. I mean-"

"¡Hola, mis gemelos! ¿Como estais?" And speak of the devil, who had arrived but none other than Spain himself, and as usual completely oblivious to the tense atmosphere around him. "Ah, Lovi~! What are you doing here? I'm so glad you're here! I was gonna come visit you later to say sorry for bringing Gilbert and Francis over your house, but now you're here so I'm sorry Lovi~!"

"Gah. Whatever, bastardo. Just don't do it again."

"Yay~! Gracias, Lovi~!"

"So, Papí. Usted y hermano deben salir juntos. Pronto." said Fern.

"But we already are, silly~!"

"WHAT? WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, BASTARD?"

"Last night~! Remember, we had tomatoes and pasta for dinner and then-" Spain suddenly stopped midsentence, for once finally noticing the atmosphere around him. Romano was giving Spain a look that said very clearly, "FINISH THAT SENTENCE OR DIE." Romano then managed to choke out, "we need to talk. Now. ALONE." Grabbing Spain by the shirt collar, Romano dragged Spain into the garage adjoining the computer room.

"Awkward..." said Nieve when Romano had finally gotten Spain into the other room.

"Umm... Sita?"

"Si, Norte?"

"What's that noise?"

"That, mi hermano, is the sound of forgiveness."

"...That's the sound of Romano screaming..."

"That is what forgiveness sounds like. Screaming and then silence."

"Ice cream, you really need to stop watching the shit that Alfredo makes."

"I watched the Spanish version. Is that any consolation, Plant?"

"Not really..."

"Oh well. Let's watch them, though. This fight is going one of two ways: either it ends with Papa writhing in pain, or with both of them going at it after Romano is done screaming."

"Okay, you REALLY need to stop hanging out with Japan and Hungary. And...how can we watch them without being seen? We're too big to look from the vents anymore. So ho-" Fern was cut off with: "Remember how I caught you and Tejas going at it?"

"Si, pero... Ooooooh, no you didn't."

"Oh yes I did! There are cameras EVERYWHERE in and around this building! And not one can be seen with the naked eye."

"Guadalupe, are they really necessary? You're a nation. None of your people are going to hurt you, and no fellow nation will attack you unprovoked. So why do you have them?"

"Because I feel safer with them. Oh, come on, Fern! Quick! We have to record them now! They're quiet! And that probably means I'll be a few more hundreds richer! Yay!"

"So they're going at it. En nuestro garaje. Ewwww!"

"Whatever, I'll clean it up later. But right now let's watch the money rollin' in!" And out of seemingly nowhere, Nieve pulls out a very large, very heavy monitoring station that is fitted with three small screens and a countless amount of buttons, knobs, and lights.

"Where the hell did this come from?" said Fern.

"My person."

"But this thing is fucking HUGE! And you carry it on your person all day!"

"Yeah. Al taught me how. Ever wonder where he hides all those hamburguesas? They're all hidden on his person. But now that I've told you this, you'll have to promise something."

"And what would that be?"

"You can't tell Inglaterra about where he hides them. Iggy already knows, but he doesn't know how Al does it. Apparently, during the American Revolution, Al hid 200 pounds of tea on his person, then managed to take it all out and dump it into Boston Harbour in under 2 minutes. Inglaterra still hasn't figured it out, but I know how he does it."

"And how does this relate to anything we're trying to do right now?"

"Hey, you asked. But let's get back to the job at hand now, FINALLY."

Nieve switched on the monitors, and the machine roared to life. Slowly, tauntingly, the monitors warmed up and began to show an increasingly clear video of the garage. When the picture could finally be seen distinctly, Fernando gasped, Nieve nearly fainted, and both Mexicanos knew that this video was certainly something to behold. Because in the garage, Romano and Spain were-

**A/N: Mwahahaha! Sorry, but yes, I am one of those evil authoresses (sp?) that leaves really really bad cliffhangers! Sorry ;D**

**Mkay, so translations! Yay!**

_**mi amiga**_**—my friend**

_**te presento—**_**I present to you**

_**Mexicanos**_** (pronounced meh-hee-CA-nos)—Mexicans**

_**Tejas**_** (te-HAHS)—Texas**

_**Ésto no es verdad! Yo sé que t**__**ú**__** y Tejas salieron semana pasada**_**!—That is not true! I know that you and Texas went out ((as in a date)) last week!**

_**Y en la casa. Japón y Hungría**_**—And in the house. Japan and Hungary…**

_**¿QUÉ?—**_**WHAT?**

_**Sí. Ellos me pagan bien.—**_**Yes. They paid me well.**

_**Yo sé.—**_**I know.**

_**Italia del Sur**_**—literally, Italy of South, aka South(ern) Italy.**

_**España**_**—Spain**

_**Spagna**_**—also means Spain, but in Italian**

_**¡**__**Hola, mis gemelos! ¿Como estais?—**_**Hello, my twins! How are you guys?**

_**Bastardo**_**—bastard, in Italian(?)**

_**Gracias**_**—Thank you**

_**Usted y hermano deben salir juntos. Pronto.—**_**You and brother should go out together. Soon.**

_**Sí, pero...—**_**Yes, but…**

_**En nuestro garaje.—**_**In our garage.**

_**hamburguesas**_**—hamburgers**

_**Inglaterra**_**—England**

**And about the names...yeah, ask Chibibun., coz I ****don't want to explain it**** am really crappy with explaining it. But I guess I'll explain what I understand of it. So, the twins have really looong names. So they have a bunch of nicknames, too. Fernando is called Fern, Plant, **_**Planta**_** (means plant), **_**Norte**_** (North), by Nieve. Nieve is called N, **_**Sita**_** (ask Chibibun. on this one~),Guadalupe (after the city), and Ice Cream (because in México, they use the word for snow (**_**nieve**_**) to mean ice cream, along with**_** helado**_**.) **

**And, also, for the twins and their different names for Spain. Fern calls Spain 'Papí' and Nieve calls him 'Papá' because they like to be difficult and different.**

**And don't worry, this fic WILL be updated…..eventually…..BUT I can guarantee that it'll be before September! :D **

**Also, I keep forgetting if I finished editing... I *think* I did... Oh well, comment if you spot something please xD**

**-is shot-**


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